Creating Our Own Barriers

Sometimes it’s hard to fathom how and when we put up barriers in our lives. We can’t get the job we want, the income we want, the relationship we want, the love we want or the life we want and we are adamant that it’s not our fault. Usually we’re pretty quick to shift the blame onto others. We blame the economy. We blame our partner. We blame anything or anyone other than the one person responsible for everything in our life – ourselves!

Years ago, I thought it would be great to learn to ride a motorcycle, so I asked my husband to teach me on his bike. And each evening after supper, I walked and he drove as we headed for the large wide-open field down the street. I loved driving a stick shift and eagerly looked forward to my lessons, knowing I would have to shift gears on the bike.

Given my years of driving standard, I thought it would be a breeze and that I would be riding on the streets in no time. Not so. On the motorcycle, my feet no longer controlled the clutch or gas and I shifted with my foot, not my hand. After numerous stalls, I finally got the bike into first gear and very occasionally into second. However, going around and round a field in first gear is neither fun nor productive. But I kept hanging onto my preconceived notion of what should take place, and when the reality didn’t fit my picture, I was lost.

As far as my mind was concerned, driving standard was done one way and I was unwilling to accept a concept different from what I knew, so the barrier went up. I literally prevented myself from moving forward because I couldn’t see outside the box. Night after night, I drove around that field in first gear. Finally, one night I became so fed up with my lack of progress, that I told myself in no uncertain terms that I knew how to drive standard, so stop thinking about it and just do it!

So, I did and I have now had my motorcycle license for decades.

Choosing to step outside my comfort zone and releasing control of how I thought things should be was huge for me, and it helped me move past the barriers blocking my advancement. And because I shifted my attitude, everything else was transformed as well. I had learnt to let go when it became extremely evident that I was the reason it took me so long to be successful; well, actually me and the barriers I had created.

My boots, my helmet and my leathers are always waiting for me to put back on and just ride. It’s amazing what transpires in life when we just let go.